Why I can't and won't, get on a scale, NSV and cleanse update

Happy freaking Monday peeps!  Can I just say I HATE the damn time change!  I mean yes, I do enjoy the extra hour of light, in the evening.  BUT...this getting up an hour early crap is literally, for the birds!  Ok I am done bitching...

I am going to touch on why I do not weigh myself. Actually why I can't.  Growing up overweight, did some major damage to my self esteem and confidence.  If I were to get on the scale once a week, it would take me back to a very bad place.  I am 5'9  and curvy.  This means that lovely little # will NEVER be low.  It is in the low 150's or maybe evn the high 140's, I am not 100% sure.  BUT...seeing that number, would make me freak out.  I would be like, "how can I fit in a size 4, when that number is so high".  SO...I go for the whole, "the proof is in the pudding" thing!  I serioulsy think if I owned a scale, I would be on it ALL the time.  So I just can't go there.  I am in too good of a place.  What works for me, may  not work for someone else, I get that.  AND 150 pounds on me, might look TOTALLY different on someone else.  I just refuse to let some little machine dictate how I feel.  Hell each freaking scale is different.  And hello, a lovely bowel movement or lack of one, can make that number fluctuate big time!  So instead of weighing, I choose to go by how my clothes fit.  Every Saturday I try on a specific pair of jeans, to gage if I have lost, gained or stayed the same.  It is a pair of NON stretch jeans.  They are my first pair of 7 jeans, from years ago.  They are size 28.  This truly keeps me in check.  I can remember trying them on 2 years ago and they were so tight, I seriously ripped the seam on the sides AND at the zipper.  OMG it as awful.  I had to lay down on the bed, just to get them zipped.  Talk about a wake-up call! Now these lovely jeans are loose!  YAY!!!  That was one of my first very memorable NSV'S! I also use a pair of capri pants that have zero stretch in them.  The reason I choose non-stretch clothes to gage is because they can't lie to me...LOL!

If you follow me on IG, you saw that I hit another NSV!  One that I truly thought would never happen.  When I ordered my new size 27 jeans, I wasn't sure they would fit.  My size 28's are gettign saggy/baggy so I figured it was time to give the 27's a try!  I was like a kid on Christmas day, getting the one present, she always wanted.  OMG it felt good!  And you know what, it motivated my ass to go workout.  It is weird how all that works.  Somedays, I go try some formally tight clothes on to make sure they still fit and this too, is just enough to motivate my ass to go workout.  It make me feel good and shows me how far I have come.  But in a much healthier, not as obsessive, kind of way.  I think my next NSV goal is to order some shorts from J Crew.  Not burmuda's but real shorts.  I have not worn shorts, since I was a kid!  I only wear long ones.  At least 10 inch in length.  I have sone 5 inch and 7 inch, in my cart as we speak.  We shall see if I actually oder them! :)

Now on to the cleanse.  Well the cleanse and I were just not meant to be.  I was SO f*cking miserable.  I mean the gas pains and bloating that I had was GOD AWFUL!  I even stayed home from work one day.  It just wasn't worth it to me.  I do not feel like I failed, I feel like I just can't do the whole cleanse/fiber in your face, kind of thing.  I am not a "regular" person to begin with, so adding all that fiber in and not being able to go "potty" was killin me!  I also had a sinus infection, which didn't help.  I think I need to stick with what works for me, eating healthy and clean and everything in moderation.  After I was off for a whole day, I felt so much better.  I did make it 3 days, so maybe that benifited me in some small way.  Once I was off, I still ate really great food, I mean I had it on hand, from cleanse prepping!  But I had so much more energy, no cramping, no headache and no GAS!  YAY FOR ME!  I wish all of you doing it, the best of luck and much success.  I am happy I tried it and truly did stick to it, for as long as I could. 

 

I hope you all had a wondeful weekend!  My mama is in town from Florida for the whole week, so I am on cloud 9!  My kiddos leave with her when she flies back, a week from today. This means the hubby and I get a 10 day kid free staycation!  OMG!  Not sure what we will do!  Then we leave for Florida and a week of fun in the sun, with the kids!  SO READY FOR VACATION!  Oh and this means I am going balls to the walls with my working out and eating healthy!  It is bikini countdown! I found this hot little mint # I want to get from Victoria's Secret.  EEEK!!

                                                         Much love to you all,
                                                                    Lori